If you are a human service professional, it is inevitable that at some point a problem that clients will report is unresolved grief issues. The death of their child may likely be an issue one or more of your clients may face. Working with a parent who is facing a child’s death can present unique challenges for a…
My daughter Jeannine died on March 1,2003, at the age of 18 due to cancer. One of the things that I struggled with during my early grief was regret and guilt over the fact that I was too wrapped up with work and finishing graduate school to see what was happening to her sooner. Of course, given the fact that the…
There are certain terms that are routinely used to classify experiences that are unequivocally different from each other. Classification, as in diagnosis, has utility in that an accurate diagnosis can determine an appropriate course of treatment for an individual. Classification also has from my perception…
I am presenting a workshop at The Compassionate Friends national conference next month entilted: “The Bereaved Parent- Five Years Later.” Linda Findlay of Mourning Discoveries and I originally developed the idea for this workshop to discuss the needs of the later grief experiences of bereaved parents. We chose…
Chemically dependent individuals like the rest of us, experience grief. In my 27 years of employment in the chemical dependency field, many individuals that I counseled experienced grief due to the death of a family member or friend. Working with grief in chemically dependent clients is challenging, due to the…
The passage of time between events is irrelevant once you begin to become aware of the connections between them. I have discovered this truth during the last two plus years of my life. This discovery started with simple intent; I simply stated to God my need to develop greater spiritual awareness. I did begin…
In early grief, it is difficult to find any meaning in pain. After my daughter Jeannine’s death in 2003, the pain I experienced in early grief was raw and something that I feared. If I had a choice, I would have avoided it at all costs. However, as I have learned, we need to work through pain in order to be able…
The pain of grief tends to surface with great intensity during “milestone” events. Birthdays, anniversaries and holidays are typical events that are associated with our grief journeys. The intensity of grief is usually highest for many during the first year that these milestone events are experienced. However…
Life does not progress in a predictable or orderly fashion. We are confronted with a series of challenges that present us with two choices: 1) To do nothing and stagnate emotionally and spiritually; 2) to allow those challenges to transform us and help us find meaning and enlightenment. This is the story about the loss of my daughter, Jeannine. I remember recently looking at a picture of my late mother and me, which was taken about thirty years ago at my wedding reception…
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As I am now entering the tenth year of my journey as a parent who has experienced the death of a child, I realize that my perspective on many things related to life and death have changed. Today (3/3/12), I had this revelation about the expectations that we place on remembering. In this context, I am referring to those individuals who don’t acknowledge our children on those special days such as birthdays and angelversary dates. I started pondering this when a friend of mine (and one whom loved Jeannine…