Barbara Rubel

Barbara Rubel, MA, BCETS, CBC, CPBC is a nationally recognized leader in the field of compassion fatigue and coping with traumatic loss. Barbara is the author of the best-selling book, But I Didn’t Say Goodbye: Helping children and families after a suicide (2nd Ed.) and the 30 hour continuing education course book for Nurses, Death, Dying, and Bereavement: Providing compassion during a time of need. Barbara is the co-author of the Dept. of Justice, Office for Victims of Crime Training Curriculum, Compassion Fatigue. Rubel is a contributing writer in Thin Threads: Grief and Renewal and Open to Hope's Fresh Grief. She was featured in the Emmy award winning Documentary, Fatal Mistakes, narrated by Mariette Hartley, sold through the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention.

Barbara developed Palette of Grief®: The art of dealing with life-changing events. She was a hospice bereavement counselor, facilitated several support groups, taught at Brooklyn College, and was a consultant with the NJ Attorney General to support those impacted by 911. Currently, she's a consultant with the Dept. of Justice. Barbara received a BS in Psychology and MA in Community Health from Brooklyn College and is a Board Certified Expert in Traumatic Stress, Diplomate, American Academy of Experts in Traumatic Stress, Certified Bereavement Specialist, and Certified Pastoral Bereavement Counselor.

When a Mother’s Heart is Broken No Comments

Why aren’t you calling? I bet you have a host of reasons from not knowing what to say to fear you might say the wrong thing. It’s not easy picking up the phone to call a grieving mother after a child has suddenly and traumatically died. It’s a fact of life that although mothers give life, they also experience loss…

The Voice in My Heart No Comments

The voice in my heart gently speaks to me. Although it’s a whisper, it’s very powerful. I recall hearing it two months into my pregnancy. I had excruciating pains and I thought I was losing my baby. However, the soothing voice in my heart told me that I had the strength to handle whatever was about to happen…

Sentimental Clutter No Comments

Several boxes of varying sizes are stacked neatly in a row. Children are often responsible for vacating their parent’s home. And that is what I did when my mom died. Although I sold much of her personal belongings and gave away items to family members, I kept those things that I could not part with…

Unpack Your Emotional Baggage No Comments

I can’t imagine traveling without baggage. It’s usually at the exact moment when I stand by my airline seat, when I realize the bag I packed is too heavy to lift into the overhead compartment. This past month, I took several flights across the country. With each trip, I remind myself that I must lighten my load…

Winged Spiritual Messengers or Coincidence? No Comments

Mom no longer speaks. She no longer watches television, gets out of bed or eats solid food. I have not heard her voice in months. She no longer wakes easily. I have to shake her to wake her. As a college graduate who served in the armed forces during World War II and as a NYC Police Officer for 20 years…

Celebrating the Birth of Triplets While Mourning Dad’s Suicide:  I Wish You Could Have Been There No Comments

I wish you could have been there . . . It was quite a sight. Three infant car seats with tiny faces and six wiggling hands and feet. We were going home, but my father would not be there to greet us. I had spent the last four weeks of my pregnancy in the hospital, and, during that time, my loving dad had died of a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head. He was gone, and I had three children to love. Although I had complete bed rest throughout my pregnancy…

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